TIME: Week 1, January 2016

PLACE: Cider Isle

CIRCUMSTANCE: The Birds

This week has been spent trying to get tradesmen to come and at the very least see the job on offer. We did have some luck with the plumber, but he’s not going to be available to do anything until February. Same old story. We have experienced it before; January is slow and people are on holidays. Nevertheless there are still things to do that are keeping us very busy, such as cleaning the bird poo off of the concrete. The poo on the walls is another story; about a second storey up. That we can’t reach, or the nesting materials at the roof apex. And there is something about that point in the roof…

If it’s not enough to be woken up frequently during the night by rolling off of a blow-up mattress, it’s creepy to hear the scratching of bird claws against metal. I prefer my Hitchcock limited to the screen, thank you. At first we thought it was cockies on the roof – and there are hundreds of those – but one morning just as the sun was coming up, Greenman jumped out of bed: ‘The birds are inside!’ and sure enough, there were birds inside. They had found their way in through a gap at the highest point above the old nesting mess; now they were flying around in a panic looking for a way out. Well, I won’t relate the details other than it took us about an hour and ended in a case of ‘biggest brain wins’.

And then more got in. This time we discovered birds inside after arriving back to the shed after being out-and-about but the event followed the same pattern of panic, poo, chase and flight anywhere but to the exit, which, I might add, was a big open roller door. We started getting a bit anxious about these birds freely accessing our new home, not just because it’s creepy and not just because I didn’t fancy a new career as chief bird poo cleaner, but any day now our furniture and contents are due to arrive and that would mean it would be impossible to chase a bird around, not to mention there would be additional places for bird poo to be deposited. This was not my idea of living close to nature. The trouble is we can’t get up high enough to plug up the hole. Hopefully the answer to this one will come in a later report.

On an up note, our going out-and-about produced some results. We bought a water tank, a shower and a sea container!

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